The Sonia Bompastor who sits down in front of me isn’t the steely-eyed ice-cool coach you see on the sidelines on matchday, in fact she is quite the opposite. She’s chatty, warm and funny – almost two different people and that’s the way she likes it.
There’s Bompastor the football coach and then the other Bompastor, the one person who, until this week, we knew very little about.
Most of the time she’s succeeded in keeping the two sides at arm’s length but this week in an interview in France ahead of the publication of her new autobiography the two collided.
The Chelsea head coach admitted to a secret she had kept for 13 years: she was in a relationship with her former team-mate and now coaching assistant Camille Abily. They share four kids together.
She felt she had no choice but to hide and compartmentalise her life but concedes it was an incredible burden to carry.
Sonia Bompastor leads the celebrations after Chelsea beat Arsenal
“I grew up with a model where a couple were a man and a woman and it was too difficult for me to just say I’m in a couple with a woman,” she exclusively tells Sky Sports.
“So yes, sometimes it was difficult. It’s still difficult. When you start to lie it’s difficult to say the truth and when it’s long, and the longer it is, it is more difficult to say.
“I just wrote that book to give something to my kids. When you write a book, of course, you don’t want to hide anything. That’s the way for you to just put your life in the book and talk about it and I think my family is probably what I’m most proud of.
“I like to keep my private life really quiet but with this book everything is going in and, yeah, that’s not the best way to keep a secret. It was difficult because even today that’s something I’m not really comfortable to talk about and maybe I’m realising I can also be a model for some people.
Bompastor with captain Millie Bright after Chelsea’s draw at Leicester – the only time they have dropped points
“That’s not something I’m used to and not comfortable with but, yes, if I can help people to realise we are living in 2025 and every difference is important. I don’t want people to judge because they are different about sexuality, but also the colour of the skin, religion and everything.
“When you are happy, just keep yourself happy. And that’s the most important thing.”
The process of opening up a part of her life to be publicly examined has been challenging but the reaction has been a really positive one. “It’s when you realise people care about your happiness and that’s the most important thing,” she continued.
Bompastor is known for her player-management skills
Perhaps if she was a player coming through the system now life might have been different, she certainly hopes so. “I think we’ve made some good progress in the world of football but also in society.
“I feel more comfortable even myself now to express that. It wasn’t the case 15 years ago. So I feel people now, especially in Chelsea, we feel support. I already talked about how much diversity we have in the team and I think that’s really important for people to feel themselves.”
As we talk she gives a rare glimpse into family life and even jokes about having four kids under 10 helping in her role as a high-powered football coach. “Really busy, organised, and you need to anticipate a lot,” she laughs. “Having my private life and this high-responsibility job, I think I just find the right balance. And when you just go back to your normal life, it’s good to have your kids because you can disconnect.”
Highlights from Chelsea’s last-gasp win over Everton in the WSL
Downtime is something Bompastor values. During the latest international break she spent three days with friends and family back in France, enjoying shopping, dining out and binging the latest survival show ‘Koh-Lanta’.
Now the switch has been flicked back to Bompastor the manager.
This is the moment in the interview the Chelsea boss really comes alive. The steely, composed focus is back as we talk about entering the decisive few months of the season and winning trophies – what does a good season look like for you, I ask? Without hesitation Bompastor replies: “Winning titles. That’s always the most important.”
Seven months into the season, Bompastor remains unbeaten as Chelsea boss
All four competitions, I follow up: “Yeah, all of them,” – again no pause.
“It’s always difficult to win every trophy, even one trophy, it’s really difficult but when you start the season you realise this team is built to compete and to win titles.
“So, yeah, the satisfaction will be only if we win the four titles. We are going to fight really hard to make sure we are in that position. I think we have the right mentality to make sure we just approach every game in a good way to be able to be successful.”
Take a look at some of the best goals from Brighton clashes with Chelsea in the Women’s Super League, featuring strikes from Fran Kirby, Jelena Cankovic and more!
Next up for Chelsea is a return to WSL action against Brighton. A stoppage-time winner from Lauren James saw them come from a goal down to beat Everton last time out and maintain their seven-point lead at the top.
Chelsea are the only unbeaten team in the league and have dropped just two points this season, drawing 1-1 at Leicester. They also added two stars to their already glittering collection in January with Keira Walsh and one of the world’s best defenders Naomi Girma, for a world record fee. Girma should be in the squad for the trip to Brighton.
Chelsea then face a staggering four meetings across three separate competitions against rivals Manchester City, all in the space of 12 days. First comes the League Cup final, followed by the first leg of their Champions League last-eight tie, before a WSL face-off for good measure. Oh and a European second leg. It’s a season-defining period.
Lauren James celebrates her late winner against Everton with Aggie Beever-Jones
The coveted Champions League is the one that has, so far, eluded Chelsea and the trophy the club are desperate to get their hands on. “This is where you can win titles and this is what everyone is here for.
“We are really happy with being busy. At the moment we didn’t win anything but we are in a really good position and confident. When you wake up in the morning, you are just so happy to come to work.
“Even if it’s difficult for me to say work, because for us it’s a passion. And we can’t wait to play every game, one after another, and being able to be successful. Chelsea has been an example for everyone but I think bringing the Champions League to England would be a big achievement. This country deserves to have the Champions League and I’m fingers crossed for us to be able to do that.
“But even if Man City or Arsenal get this title, it will be really good for the country.”
On the evidence of her first few months in charge it’s hard to bet against Bompastor.
Chelsea have been near-perfect and Bompastor is a self-confessed perfectionist. Expect Chelsea to raise their level to another gear, now that it really matters.
Watch Brighton vs Chelsea (3pm) and Arsenal vs West Ham (5.30pm) live on Sky Sports on Sunday. Stream with no contract on NOW
